Random Saturday Thoughts

10212044-293937429_5-s1-v1We tawk funny in New York City. Sometimes I hear myself say things that make me laugh and wonder. Aside from my New Yawk accent people often pin down my home country from my phrasing – such as “stand ON line”. It seems most folks stand IN line. I’ve also noticed we use the ‘leave’ where other folks would use the word ‘let’. As in “leave it be” instead of let it be. Tho leave for let is not such a big stretch, is it?

Also on the topic of NYC, and hometowns in general – I was reading about someone’s vacation trip to NYC and they referred to walking across the Brooklyn Bridge as “a thing”  – meaning, I guess, that it is some sort of tourist activity. I did a double take at that because, well, people have been walking across the Brooklyn Bridge as a part of their daily commute for, well forever. It’s been a “thing” since 1883.

I suppose if I went to that person’s hometown I would be surprised by things they take for granted and have just, you know, always been that way. Perhaps we just take our hometowns for granted, like so many other things like…

 

10212044-293937429_5-s1-v1A blog friend is the bakery manager at a small supermarket in a small town. Her blog usually is about her various craft projects – she is very artistic and talented. She doesn’t do politics or controversy.

One of her responsibilities as bakery manager is decorating cakes to order and her considerable artistic talents are put to good use – she has posted photos of some of her cakes and they are awesome.

She recently wrote about an order she received that had her taken aback a little – the order was taken by another employee and my friend contacted the customer to make sure the order was taken correctly. The decoration for the cake is offensive, at least to me, and the message can be taken 2 ways, I suppose. My friend and her co-workers also found the whole thing more than a bit tone deaf, to put it kindly, but they are hardly in a position to school the customer or refuse to comply. And while I did comment on her original post about this questionable sentiment, today when she posted a photo of the finished cake I just couldn’t say anything – her blog is NOT the place to start that kind of discussion.  I try to be mindful of people’s intent – the whole cake decoration thing bothered her enough that she spoke of it but a discussion of why is not the intent of her blog. I now regret saying anything at all.

I often read things that trigger a reaction that is personal – I have to be very careful to keep my opinions to myself, especially when there is nothing to be gained by voicing them.  Is there ever anything to be gained by voicing a personal opinion in public? Discuss among yourselves.

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And finally – My little girl cat, Miss Frankie Lulu Belle – I love that cat to pieces. It is very disturbing how much I love that cat. I understand her completely – I know what her every meow and squeak means. I can read her like a book.

I have lived with a number of cats over the years, my first cat was a Siamese named Max. Max was an extraordinary creature and he and I were totally dependent on one another – we were as one. I shall never love any creature as I loved him. But – Miss Frankie – oh my – I love her sooo much but our relationship is different from Max’s and mine. She is getting on in years and my mind often strays to when she will have to leave me – and it upsets me so much – her leaving. Do I love her more than Max? Max more than her? No – just differently – the way we love people differently – we love them for who THEY are – not in comparison to someone else.

Which reminds me of something I either read somewhere or thought of myself – People will love you the way they need to love, not necessarily the way you need to be loved.

I gotta stop saying that…

Years ago, many, many, many years ago, I had a friend who had a friend who was called ‘Boo’.  I once asked my friend why he called his friend ‘Boo’ and he replied “Don’t know – he’s just always been called Boo” Okay – this nickname would have been acquired back in the late 1950’s, or maybe earlier, since no one remembers when ‘Boo’ became ‘Boo” and said ‘Boo” was born in 1947…

At any rate, I never met this Boo fellow and I lost touch with my friend. Fast forward to 1990 and my husband bought me a Siamese cat who I promptly named Boo-Boo. I can’t recall why, but I did.

Fast forward even more years and we reach 2018. That’s when I started to call people ‘Boo’. I mean just random people who I met and had a pleasant interaction with. I call my husband Boo quite often, just in passing, without thinking. And just yesterday, I commented on  Hummings blog post ‘That is one fat frog, Boo…”

This morning I looked up the meaning of ‘Boo’ as a nickname and – whoopsie – I realized that I have been using it in a most inappropriate way – at least when I am talking to strangers or passing acquaintances. If you are unfamiliar with the current meaning of ‘Boo’ you can check it out  HERE.

It’s kinda a pain in the ass to be constantly be on one’s guard when talking to people, most especially just the random folks you meet and interact with in a general way. I guess I shouldn’t be saying “Thank you, Boo” to the deli clerk at the supermarket, regardless of how nice he is to me and how much I always tell him I appreciate his kindness.

I read a blog this morning that discussed whether being called a ‘broad’ – old, feisty, tough or otherwise – was something the readers took offense at. Most commenters said no. Personally, I’m not offended by such a description, I probably wouldn’t even notice,  but I am also weary of labels – so many these days – everybody is something very specific that quite frankly gives me more information than I am interested in knowing. 

On a general day-to-day basis the only thing we need to know about each other is that we are human beings. Anything more specific than that is just TMI until and if and when the relationship becomes more personal.

Lawsie, lawsie but I am becoming so old and grumpy.

It’s a wonderful, lovely, dreary, rainy October day

9 o’clock this morning, temperature about 60, humidity in the 90’s, light rain with the promise of heavier rain by late afternoon with the temperatures dropping into the 50’s, at which point it will be the MOST perfect October day –

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What I love most about October are these rainy, chill days. “Pish tosh!” you all will say, “don’t be perverse, warm and sunny wins the day” Well,  pish tosh to you…I love these days. I live for these days, they are my perfect days. October days…

Yes the beginning of October may be sunny and warmish, with the colors just turning and I love those too. But they belong to early October. And while it is not quite late October, being only the 16th, still this lovely dreary, rainy, somewhat chilly day, is a small taste of late October perfection.

There is something so cozy and comforting and protective about a late October day, rain pelting windows, winds blowing orange leaves, plastering them against the windows and making shadows on the walls in the foggy dim light of an afternoon.

Onward then I say, to late October, and many such cozy afternoons…

We get so invested

in our own likes and dislikes that when we encounter someone with opposite likes and dislikes, we not only disparage the other person’s but we dig our heels into justifying our own. And thus force the other person to justify theirs. Why? Because I don’t like what you like I am NOT criticizing your choice. I just don’t share it.

I make a concerted effort to never comment negatively on something that is most definitely a personal choice.  Please don’t ask me if I like your new haircut, dress, coat, sofa, house, home decor choices. If I find something agreeable I will say so, if I don’t I will keep my mouth shut and my opinion to myself.  Your life, your choices. What makes you happy. I may not understand why it makes you happy, but do I really have to?

And I’d really appreciate that kind of consideration in return. I’ve never asked for anyone’s opinion about my personal choices. I don’t care if you like my haircut, clothes, furniture, home or home decor. I please myself, I chose what makes ME happy and suits MY lifestyle and I make no apologies if those choices don’t coincide with either the general, common wisdom or your preferences. Because – It’s My Life!

I’ve had people get pissed off at me because I don’t share their likes. Seriously? Let me give you an example. I don’t do holidays – Christmas, New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, Easter , Thanksgiving, whatever – just another day to me (tho I do send Christmas cards – just a way to keep in touch at least once a year.) Therefore I do not do seasonal decorations. I don’t do any kind of decorations. I am a minimalist. I don’t want, or need, a bunch of ‘stuff’ cluttering up my home. I have just exactly what I need and no more. I have no attachment to things. If it doesn’t have a practical, useful function then I don’t want/need it. That’s me, okay?

Several years ago a friend thought I was deprived because I don’t put up a Christmas tree or Christmas decorations. I have, over the years, posted on my blog and on FB, that I don’t celebrate Christmas, don’t decorate, don’t care but she decided she knew me better than I know myself. So she sent me a live, mini decorated Christmas tree. What the hell was I supposed to do with that, I thought. First, I don’t want the damn thing. Second, I have nowhere to put the damn thing. Third, it had little bugs! – Eww.

So I took a photo of it in the middle of my dining table, posted it on my blog and FB, sent her a thank you note and then threw the thing away.  And wouldn’t you know, the following year she sent me another one. Okay, dokey – same drill, post photos, send thank you note, dump in the trash room. By the third year I’d had enough – I didn’t want her wasting her money for starters and I DIDN’T WANT THE DAMN THING.

So – I sent her note thanking her and let her know that while I appreciate the thought I just had no place to put it and in the spirit of the season I took it over to the senior citizen home across the street from me and they were thrilled to get it.

The upshot of that was – she no longer speaks to me. I suppose I could have just kept throwing them out and she would have kept sending the damn things and wasting her money.

Last year I had my kitchen renovated. I had the garbage disposal and the dishwasher taken out, I bought smaller appliances (NOT stainless steel BTW – I hate that shit), had flat panel cabinets in honey maple put in (NOT white shaker style cabinets – I hate that shit). I did some redesigning of the space so it suited MY needs and taste. And don’tcha’ know – the renovating company, the counter installers, a few people who saw the finished kitchen all said “But people don’t do that!”

Well, guess what – I’m not ‘people’.  I do not give a shit what ‘people‘ do. I needed my kitchen to work for me and be a place I like to look at and work in. Nor do I give a shit about ‘re-sale value’. When I sell this place then the people who buy it can make it what they want – that’s if they have the balls to actually make their home something particular to them instead of what all the rest of ‘the people’ like.

So – like what you like and what makes you happy and don’t apologize for it. And for the love of all that is holy – Don’t criticize other people’s happy!  Remember this –

imnotu

 

 

One of the great disappointments

in my life is my complete and utter lack of artistic ability. I can not draw a straight line with a ruler. I have images in my head I would like to get down on paper but I can’t – I simply do NOT have that skill, ability or talent.

And it makes me crazy!

In high school we had to take two semesters of art – not art history, which would have been easy-peasy and an instant A for me. Oh no – it was art where you had to draw things. I can’t draw! The first semester the art teacher gave me a decent grade, which I hadn’t earned, because, he said, “You are too smart to fail art. You can’t help it that you have no talent for it.” The second semester I passed on my own, on the basis of being able to master drawing a 3-D box and one drawing, in pastels, of an emotion. It needed no particular skill, trust me, but the teacher liked it. Go me?

Every year I make my own Christmas cards. I started out using images I found on the internet and composing my own message. I moved on to using photographs I had taken, along with my own message. Last year I superimposed a Santa hat on a photo of my cat…it came out really well and everyone enjoyed it.

This year I have an image in my head – I certainly can’t draw it but I thought I could find various elements on the internet and layer them into one image. Yeah, it seems I’m not good with that either.

My lack of artistic talent is so damn frustrating!